This is so great, and I've been looking for the "when you're fundraising, it's AI..."-tweet for months, so I'm collecting the nuggets here for me to peruse:
Tech buzzwords explained:
Dark web—Onion service
Data science—statistics done by nonstatisticians
When you’re fundraising, it’s AI
When you’re hiring, it’s ML
When you’re implementing, it’s linear regression
When you’re debugging, it’s printf()
When computer scientists say "big data" they usually mean data that's big enough that you can't process it on a single machine.
Some people use "big data" to mean something like "large-scale, fine-grained data about people that can be used to make harmful inferences about them."
If you're a technologist confused about headlines like these, it turns out that "algorithm" now means "automated decision-making".
Finally, "viral". @duncanjwatts & other have a fascinating claim, backed by data, that viral propagation on social media is largely a myth, and that the popularity of (say) tweets is explained by the popularity of the most prominent user who retweeted it.
There were some nice ones in the responses as well—I think there's more truth in this one that anyone will ever admit:
AI - Excel
Big data - Excel
Blockchain - Excel
Algorithm - Excel
Cloud - Google spreadsheet
Crypto - Excel
Dark web - Excel
Data science - Excel chart
Disruption - Excel 2018
Viral - Excel macros
scrum - meetings
Also, Machine Learning: Low paid foreigners looking at or filtering content
Your report card is posted publicly, as is everybody else's, at 3 pm. Everyone fights with each other for the chance to put them in the principal's secure filing cabinet. If you win the fight, you get an A in gym. You can sell the A to other students in exchange for drugs.
D.A.R.E. to mine!